St. Augustine’s Episcopal Church

It is a joy to be planning a wedding service. This information should help you decide if St. Augustine’s might be the right choice for your wedding. Once you have read through this information, if you have further questions please call the church at 783-2153.

Married in Church?

The reason for being married in a church is that you wish to make your vows before God, have God’s blessing on your marriage, and because you wish as a married couple to be part of a Christian community of faith. Wanting a pretty building or a convenient location is not an adequate reason for a church wedding – there are lots of other lovely sites to be married.

Married in the Episcopal Church?

If one or both of the couple are Episcopalians, marriage in an Episcopal Church embeds your marital relationship even more firmly in the community to which you belong, and usually you will want to be married in the parish which one or both of you are attending. Occasionally, when a couple or extended family belong to different churches or live in different areas, a church other than one’s parish might be the best fit. If you are looking for a new denomination and considering the Episcopal church, come and worship a few times in the parish, and talk with the rector. The Episcopal Church does not provide marriage services for people of other denominations who want to avoid being married in their own tradition but are not considering membership in the Episcopal Church.

Married by the Rector?

The rector of St. Augustine’s is glad to officiate for couple of whom at least one partner has been a communicant member of the parish for at least the preceeding six months. For situations of pastoral need, sometimes children of parishioners who are not yet settled in a parish elsewhere may return to the parish of their family to be married. For Episcopal students of the University of Rhode Island, weddings at St. Augustine’s may be arranged with consultation with one’s home clergy.

Pre-marital Preparation

The Canon Law of the Episcopal Church requires pre-marriage preparation with the clergy. The rector will meet with the couple not less than four times for discernment and planning. These sessions cover a variety of issues facing those considering marriage and are informal, can be fun, and involve some homework between sessions.

When can we set the date?

While you may have a month in mind, do not set the date of your wedding until you have met with the rector enough times to have approval to proceed. The preparation process involves real openness and discernment about the decision to marry for all concerned. It is disappointing and expensive to book your reception site and make your plans only to find you are not ready or the rector or building is not available on that date.

Is this a second marriage ?

The rules of the Episcopal Church require the permission of the Diocesan Bishop for the second marriage of one or both partners after divorce. This process takes at least 60 days. A copy of your final divorce decree will be needed, and the divorced person will be asked to write a letter about the causes of the divorce, the healing done since, and the reason the second marriage might be expected to suceed. The rector will be glad to help you through this process.

Can we rent the Church and/or hall and have our own clergy or Justice of the Peace officiate?

Yes, if the buildings are available on the date you request, and with the approval of the rector. The parish has a full institutional kitchen that you may rent. A list of facilities and fees is available.

Hiring a Musician

For those wishing to use the piano or organ at St. Augustine’s, it is necessary first to confer with the parish director of music who may be available to play for your wedding and/or to consult with you about choice of music; this needs to be arranged with him/her at least 60 days in advance. If a guest musician uses the parish instruments, it is a courtesy for that person to confer with the director of music, and the couple are responsible for paying a bench fee to him. (See fee sheet)

Sponsors for Marriage

The rector asks those at whose wedding she will officiate to choose a couple who are members of the parish and have a strong marriage of long duration to be sponsors for them. The sponsors’ responsibilities are to meet with the marrying couple at least twice in their time of preparation and have frank conversations about each couple’s relationship and what has helped the marriage of the sponsors to endure. The sponsors will pray for the couple privately and publicly, and will testify on behalf of the congregation that in their discernment with them they have found the marrying couple’s relationship to be healthy, godly, respectful, loving and to manifest the presence of Christ. The sponsors also should befriend the marrying couple in their first year of marriage and have permission to intervene to help if there are any signs of trouble. Then, when the congregation promises at the wedding to uphold the couple in their life together, all are assured that this promise means more than words. Not every Episcopal Church has sponsors for marriage, but the rector has found this to be a helpful and joyful experience for all concerned. St. Augustine’s takes seriously the Christian understanding that married couples build up the Church, and the church community strengthens and supports Christian marriage.

Can we be married on Sunday morning?

A marriage service in the context of the Sunday Eucharist is a wonderful option. The rector will be delighted to discuss this possibility with you. Traditionally, church weddings are not held at any time during the season of Lent.

So you’d like to be married at St. Augustine ’s?

First, please don’t set the date or finalize your wedding plans until you have met with the Rector, Jennifer Phillips! The Episcopal Church requires at least three meetings for pastoral preparation before the clergy can officiate at a marriage.

Choosing to be married in a church rather than a secular setting means that you are making your marriage promises to God as well as to each other, and calling on the Church community to witness this and help and uphold you as you try to live into them over time. We believe that Christian marriage needs to be anchored in church membership and we warmly invite you to become part of this warm and lovely community next to URI. At least one member of the couple must be an Episcopal Communicant in good standing --which means attending church for awhile and getting to know the community and grounding your marriage discernment in prayer.

If this is a second or subsequent marriage following divorce for either of you, the preparation process involves getting permission from the Diocesan Bishop and can take several months. The Rector will guide you through the process.

If you wish, it perfectly fine to have a civil marriage and then come to church for a Blessing of that Marriage some time afterwards. In any case, you will need to secure a marriage license from South Kingstown Town Hall and give it to the officiating clergy before the service can be performed.

Our building seats roughly 150 in the church. The parish hall (not fully wheelchair accessible yet, alas) is available for rental along with a spacious commercial kitchen. For members, fee for use of these facilities for a wedding and reception is $400; for nonmembers it is $600. There are community groups using the parish hall regularly on Saturday mornings and evenings and Wednesday evenings, but at other times they are available. The post-and-beam church has lots of natural light from big windows looking out into the trees.

Ordinarily the church musician is available to play for weddings if desired at standard AGO rates ($250-300 depending on whether the rehearsal is included). Music selections need to be approved by the Rector - just to make sure they are suitable for church use. You are welcome to bring your own musicians. If the pipe organ or piano is used by another musician, it is customary to pay a bench fee to the resident musician ($150) as well. An honorarium is appropriate for officiating clergy. If money is a problem, please speak to the rector about adjusting fees.

The rector will be happy to discuss details of your wedding with you and help you plan, and can recommend resource people to you as well. The congregation of St. Augustine’s will be glad to pray for you in your time of discernment and planning as you begin life together - may God bless you on the journey.